November rolls in with its mix of cozy mornings, unpredictable weather, and endless coffee refills. It’s that in-between month when we’re torn between pumpkin pie and early holiday stress. Humor is the perfect way to survive it—laughing at the chaos makes the chill feel lighter and the days brighter.
In this post, you’ll find over 80 short funny November quotes—each a bite-sized piece of wit, sarcasm, and seasonal truth.
Whether you’re battling the thermostat, indulging in leftovers, or just trying to stay awake past 6 p.m., these quotes are sure to keep you smiling all month long.
Cozy November Mornings
- “November’s dress code: sweater in the morning, regret by noon, blanket burrito by night.” — Unknown
- “My November motivation level matches the temperature—steadily dropping.” — Unknown
- “In November, my alarm clock becomes my worst enemy.” — Unknown
- “November mornings are just October’s hangovers.” — Unknown
- “Waking up in November should count as cardio.” — Unknown
- “Coffee is my only heat source until noon.” — Unknown
- “Every November morning starts with ‘just five more minutes.’” — Unknown
- “The only thing colder than a November morning is my motivation.” — Unknown
- “In November, getting out of bed feels like an Olympic sport.” — Unknown
- “If November had a smell, it would be equal parts coffee and denial.” — Unknown
Weather Woes and Wardrobe Struggles
- “November weather is a mystery novel — full of twists, and I’m always dressed wrong.” — Unknown
- “In November, my wardrobe is 40% cozy, 60% questioning my life choices at 7 a.m.” — Unknown
- “November is when fashion gives up and layering takes over.” — Unknown
- “By mid-November, I’m just layering sweaters until I look like a fabric hoarder.” — Unknown
- “November fashion tip: it’s not about matching, it’s about surviving.” — Unknown
- “Sweaters in the morning, t-shirts by noon, and regret by 3 p.m.” — Unknown
- “November: where weather apps go to lie.” — Unknown
- “If you think you’re dressed right in November, wait ten minutes.” — Unknown
- “My November outfits are just cozy chaos.” — Unknown
- “November: where the wind judges your outfit choices.” — Unknown
Coffee, Comfort, and Chaos
- “I measure November days by how many times I reheat my coffee.” — Unknown
- “I’d romanticize November more if it didn’t get dark before my coffee finished cooling.” — Unknown
- “November: when coffee becomes a lifestyle, not a beverage.” — Unknown
- “Caffeine and sarcasm are my November survival kit.” — Unknown
- “In November, my blood type is officially coffee.” — Unknown
- “November is just coffee season disguised as a month.” — Unknown
- “My coffee’s getting cold faster than my willpower.” — Unknown
- “Coffee first, responsibilities never—November edition.” — Unknown
- “November: the month my coffee budget doubles.” — Unknown
- “Coffee: because November mornings don’t joke.” — Unknown
Thanksgiving Humor
- “This month I’m thankful for elastic waistbands and friends who understand second helpings are non-negotiable.” — Unknown
- “November: the only month where I can call pie ‘breakfast’ and still be respected.” — Unknown
- “November’s motto: feast now, panic about gift shopping later.” — Unknown
- “I don’t count calories in November—only pies.” — Unknown
- “My favorite Thanksgiving exercise is lifting leftovers.” — Unknown
- “If Thanksgiving had a logo, it would be me in stretchy pants.” — Unknown
- “In November, gratitude starts with gravy.” — Unknown
- “November is my training season for eating as if dessert is an appetizer.” — Unknown
- “November: where diets go to hibernate.” — Unknown
- “Leftovers are just proof that November loves me.” — Unknown
Dark Evenings and Lazy Vibes
- “I’d do more in November if it didn’t get dark before my motivation starts.” — Unknown
- “November sunsets: proof that the day is shorter than my to-do list.” — Unknown
- “November: when the sun clocks out early and so do I.” — Unknown
- “The only thing longer than a November night is my list of excuses.” — Unknown
- “November is the month I perfect the art of staying in.” — Unknown
- “Early darkness means early pajamas—no regrets.” — Unknown
- “In November, 6 p.m. feels like midnight and I’m fine with that.” — Unknown
- “November’s vibe: dim lights, warm socks, and ignoring responsibilities.” — Unknown
- “November: the month made for canceling plans.” — Unknown
- “Evenings in November come with built-in permission to nap.” — Unknown
Financial Funnies and Heating Bills
- “November: the month my thermostat and my bank account start fighting over the heating bill.” — Unknown
- “Heating costs rise as my will to cook drops.” — Unknown
- “November: when I debate whether I really need hot water.” — Unknown
- “My wallet’s as cold as my toes in November.” — Unknown
- “In November, I warm my hands over my bank statement.” — Unknown
- “If money could buy warmth, I’d still be broke in November.” — Unknown
- “Budgeting in November means picking between coffee and comfort.” — Unknown
- “November bills hit harder than the cold.” — Unknown
- “November: the month where every degree costs extra.” — Unknown
- “Heating: the luxury I pretend is optional in November.” — Unknown
Food, Feasts, and Fall Cravings
- “November is when I start hoarding canned goods… mostly whipped cream.” — Unknown
- “Calories in November don’t count—they’re seasonal.” — Unknown
- “Pumpkin pie isn’t a dessert, it’s an emotion.” — Unknown
- “November diet: pie, coffee, repeat.” — Unknown
- “My favorite fall flavor is ‘more, please.’” — Unknown
- “November: sponsored by carbs and comfort food.” — Unknown
- “If it’s warm and edible, it’s on my November menu.” — Unknown
- “November is just a month-long pregame for dessert.” — Unknown
- “Soup counts as self-care in November.” — Unknown
- “In November, I believe in balanced meals—pie in both hands.” — Unknown
Sarcastic November Truths
- “I wait all year for November, then remember it’s just colder mornings with more laundry.” — Unknown
- “November is the plot twist of fall—pretty, but inconvenient.” — Unknown
- “If November had a personality, it’d be tired but trying.” — Unknown
- “November: because someone had to be between pumpkins and panic shopping.” — Unknown
- “Nothing says November like pretending to be productive.” — Unknown
- “In November, my calendar’s full but my energy’s empty.” — Unknown
- “November’s goal: survive without freezing or overspending.” — Unknown
- “I love November until it actually starts.” — Unknown
- “November is like a sequel nobody asked for but we watch anyway.” — Unknown
- “November: where the weather and my attitude both fluctuate.” — Unknown
Gratitude and Grumbling
- “This month I’m giving thanks for socks, sarcasm, and staying indoors.” — Unknown
- “November gratitude list: heat, coffee, and Wi-Fi.” — Unknown
- “I’m thankful for leftovers and loose clothing.” — Unknown
- “Grateful for the little things, like not slipping on frosty mornings.” — Unknown
- “November teaches patience—mostly with the thermostat.” — Unknown
- “I’m thankful for friends who bring snacks, not drama.” — Unknown
- “In November, gratitude comes wrapped in a blanket.” — Unknown
- “Thankful for elastic waistbands and flexible schedules.” — Unknown
- “November: gratitude seasoned with sarcasm.” — Unknown
- “Gratitude’s easier when there’s pie involved.” — Unknown
Cozy Reflections and Chill Humor
- “November: the season of hot drinks and cold realities.” — Unknown
- “If November were a sound, it’d be a yawn.” — Unknown
- “The colder it gets, the funnier my excuses become.” — Unknown
- “November is the introvert’s Olympics.” — Unknown
- “I like my Novembers like my coffee—hot, strong, and keeping me awake through early sunsets.” — Unknown
- “November’s chill makes my personality look warm.” — Unknown
- “Cozy is my November love language.” — Unknown
- “November proves that comfort is a form of wisdom.” — Unknown
- “Nothing beats a lazy November Sunday.” — Unknown
- “In November, happiness is found under a blanket.” — Unknown
Conclusion
November might test our patience with cold mornings and early sunsets, but it also gives us plenty to laugh about. From sweater struggles to heating bill wars, these short funny November quotes capture the cozy chaos we all know too well.
Which quote made you laugh the most? Share your favorites in the comments, or add your own witty November observations.
And if you ever need a quick pick-me-up this season, revisit this list—because a little humor goes a long way when the days get short and the coffee gets cold.